


The Bro Code Forbids

by perdue



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-28
Updated: 2011-09-28
Packaged: 2017-10-24 03:04:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/258234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perdue/pseuds/perdue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Months ago, Dave asked John if sharing a bed would rid them of their nightmares. Maybe as roommates in college they can give it a try. Dave/John two-shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [piratenkoenigin](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=piratenkoenigin).
  * Inspired by [Dave/John Zingled Log](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/4692) by revolutionator, piratenkoenigin. 



> reading the zingled log will make this fic muuuch betteeeer  
> also vector/pirate logs are the CUTEST
> 
> also as a warning when i wrote this i had not yet reached act 5, so there are details that do not match with canon. sorry!

The dorm room didn't look quite as big as it had before they moved all of his things in, but compared to some of the other open doors he'd passed, he figured his was still pretty spacious. Though, John supposed, that could be because everyone else's roommates had already moved in, and his was nowhere to be seen.

"Are you going to be okay?" dad asked, his voice a little raspy with fatherly grief. John turned to him, and despite how anxious he felt about Dave's absence, he still had the decency to give his dad a concerned, pitying expression.

"Yeah dad, of course," he said softly. Dad sniffled a little and looked at John lovingly.

"I can't believe how grown up you look." John gaped when he saw tears running down his father's cheeks and immediately moved toward him, wrapping his arms around his father's chest. Gosh it was weird he could do that now. Dad pressed The Kiss of Fatherly Affection to the crown of his head and murmured, "I'm so proud of you, son," and John suddenly felt tears well up in his own eyes.

"I love you, dad," he said, voice muffled against his father's shoulder. Dad squeezed him once more before releasing him, one hand on his shoulder as he looked him in the eyes.

"I love you too, John." He patted John's shoulder. "Don't forget to call if you need anything. It's not too far for me to drive," he said. John grinned and wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Yeah dad, I know." His father smiled and made his way for the door.

"Goodbye, son."

"Bye, dad."

\--

John thought he could really get used to Bellingham. There was something calm in the autumn air as he walked through red square, despite the bustle of new and returning students. He thought briefly, heat rising in his cheeks, that Dave would probably really enjoy taking photos out here.

"John~!" chirped a high-pitched voice, the single syllable stretched out so long that John couldn't help but turn and wonder if it was indeed intended for him. His grin widened as a short girl with long black hair and big, round glasses came bounding towards him.

"Jade!" he exclaimed, and she jumped towards him, throwing her arms around his neck; he spun around from the force of her hug, her blue skirt fluttering. When she let go of him, he looked at her, a large ( _dorky_ , he could hear Dave's voice in his head) grin on his face. "Gosh, Jade, I'm so glad we ran into each other!"

"Haha, me too!" she giggled. "I'm really glad it was actually you, since a lot of the guys here seem to also be wearing plaid with big rectangle glasses!"

"Jeez Jade, don't make me sound like such a hipster, we both know that's Dave's area of expertise."

There was a moment of silence, and John worried that somehow he'd made things awkward already, but she just tilted her head to the side and gazed at him questioningly. "Where is he?"

A blush rose to his cheeks and he averted his eyes. "He hasn't come in yet. I thought he was supposed to fly in today, but I haven't heard from him."

Even though he wasn't looking at her, he could tell she was concerned. Somehow he wasn't surprised that Jade's emotions seemed to radiate from her. "I'm sure he'll be here soon, John."

Nodding absently, John forced a grin. "Uh, yeah! But anyways, where are you living, Jade? I haven't seen you at all around north campus!"

"I'm in Fairhaven, actually."

"Haha, that seems so like you."

"What about you?"

"Nash."

"Oh, we're so far away from each other!"

"Well what are you doing now? We should hang out while we have the chance."

"That sounds like fun! We're closer to your dorm, should we go there?"

John paused. "Um, no, l-let's go see yours! I haven't been to south campus at all yet."

She gave him a searching look, but her tone was as enthusiastic as ever as she said, "Okay!"

They both shifted their bags and turned towards south campus. John stared at the brick ground. "It's kind of weird…"

"What is?"

"You not saying evasive things about the future."

He looked at her then, but her gaze was on the ground, a sad smile on her lips.

\--

Light was slowly leaving the sky when John finally made his way back across campus. He and Jade had watched a movie or two, talked to Rose online, and eventually Jade dragged him to the lounge and forced him to play the piano for her. He had tried to be discreet with the way he texted Dave every few hours asking if everything was okay, asking why he wasn't answering. She politely didn't comment, instead doing her best to distract him from his obvious anxiety. He was thankful for her attempts, even if they didn't quite work.

When he finally arrived back to his residence hall, he had to force himself not to run to his room, half expecting Dave might be there waiting for him…

But when he opened the door, it was exactly the same as he left it. A few posters from Nic Cage movies on the wall above his bed, plain blue bedspread tidy and well-kept, a small bookshelf next to his bed, full of code guides and textbooks and shitty movies, a relatively small keyboard propped up next to his desk, a small television and his laptop covering his desk, one picture of he and his father at the circus a few years ago on the windowsill. Dave's side of the room was still empty, untouched.

Something in his chest seized, and John closed and locked the door behind him, heading straight for his bed and crawling on top of the covers, pulling the stuffed bunny Dave had given him all those years ago to him and curling up with it held it against his chest. He tried to ignore the tears that dripped from his eyes, slowly wetting his pillow.

\--

BANG

_Thud._

"I – I can't…"

Jack Noir stood over Eridan's dead body, his head unrecognizable for the bullet that just ripped through it. "Try to concentrate, John," he snarled, dropping the shotgun he had stolen from Jade and lifting his sword instead.

"Please – please stop—"

With one clean swipe, the heads of Equius, Nepeta, and Feferi all rolled to the ground, their bodies slumping forward. The edge of the sword became lodged in Terezi's throat, and her scream, curdled with the blood filling her lungs, drowned out John's sobs.

"But you surely don't care about this worthless lot of trolls. Not like you care about the humans," Jack said, voice seething with hateful condescension as he walked to the other end of the lineup of John's friends, each one on their knees, hands tied behind their backs. He raised the shotgun again, finally stopping behind Jade, whose weeping became louder as Terezi's screaming finally died. John fought against his binds.

"Oh God, _please, please don't_!"

BANG

_Thud._

"Now do you understand how _fucking_ serious this is!?" Jack shouted. He raised the gun again and without moving pointed it at Vriska, pulling the trigger. _Thud._ "Where did you put the fucking ring!"

" _Let me go_!" John screamed. Another thrust of the sword pierced so deeply through Gamzee's back that the tip of it could be seen poking through his chest. " _L-Let my friends go, please, I'm begging you_!"

"This will all end if you just _give me what I want_."

" _I don't know what you're talking about_ ," he sobbed, pulling helplessly at the chains holding him against the wall. Another shot was fired, and Tavros' body fell to the ground.

"John, this is entirely your fault." Another shot, Aradia's body went limp.

"G- _God_ ," he groaned, choking on his own sobs.

"If it weren't for you, for your _incompetence_ , none of this would be happening." John barely registered the next shot, his ears ringing from the previous ones. He could see Kanaya slump to the ground through his tears. Only four of his friends remained. Sollux had his head bent, his entire body quaking with fear; Karkat was staring at John, mouth agape with labored breaths as tears streamed from his wide eyes; Rose's eyes were closed tightly, her sobs becoming louder with each shot; Dave's shades were ever present, but even John could see the tear tracks running steadily down his cheeks.

" _I'm sorry_ ," he cried. " _I'm so sorry_!"

"Oh, sorry doesn't cut it, John, not when your friends have you to thank for their deaths."

"Don't fucking listen to him." Dave's voice cut through the hysteria, tone quivering but determined. Jack Noir stood up straight, expression affronted. He walked over and stood behind Dave, kicking him roughly so that he fell forward, his sunglasses falling from his face, revealing blood red eyes that were staring straight into John's. John tried to call out Dave's name, but his breath hitched in his throat. Rose wailed at the sight of her brother, Karkat's heavy breathing reduced to whimpers. Jack raised the shotgun once more, aiming at the back of Dave's head.

" _No! KILL ME INSTEAD!_ "

BANG

\--

John awoke with a start, breathing heavily and shivering despite the sweat soaking his clothes and hair. The room was dark and he stared at his surroundings, frightened and unsure of where he was, exactly, until he saw the empty bed across from him and remembered. _Dave._

He instinctually reached for his PDA, but it wasn't next to his pillow where he usually kept it when he slept. Blinking and trying to shake the confusion and exhaustion of the night-terror he'd just experienced, John slowly realized that he had fallen asleep with his clothes on. He reached into his pocket and found his PDA there, urgently bringing it in front of his face. But there were still no text responses from Dave. The time on his PDA said 3:23am, but John didn't care; he knew Dave wouldn't either. He pressed the second speed-dial option and waited with baited breath as it began to ring.

 _Sorry bitches, but Dave Strider is much too cool to get to his phone right now. You might as well leave a message, though I can't promise I'll call back._ Beep.

"D-Dave," he said into the phone, his voice scratchy from sleep and trembling with fear. "Please call me back. I… I need you."

Pressing the end button, John carefully removed his glasses and laid his head back down on his pillow, clutching the PDA as he slowly drifted back to sleep.

\--

Dave Strider turned the rental van onto Indian Street, squinting through his sunglasses at every intersection, wondering when the school would finally come into view. He glanced over at Bro, who was sound asleep in the passenger's seat. He considered punching him awake, but figured he didn't really want to start an epic battle while driving. They were about to arrive, anyways.

The closer they got, the more Dave had to fight down the increasing (and totally unironic) feeling of nervousness that was forming a clump of anxiety at the bottom of his stomach. He had told John a long time ago that when they finally met, he was afraid that his façade would crack, that finally seeing John in person after so many torturous years of wanting but never being allowed would force him to completely lose his cool. What had John said to him? "for some stupid reason i can't really imagine being with anyone except you." Oh, jegus. That had been months ago. Now the countdown was clinging to mere minutes.

Finally the hill they were climbing rounded out and some tall buildings came into view, and Dave was pretty sure the brick one straight ahead was the one he'd be living in for the rest of the year. With John.

He pulled into the roundabout. There was only one other car there at 5:50am, and he parked behind it, pulling the emergency brake and taking the key out of the ignition. Quietly, Dave unbuckled and got out of the van, walking around the back to get into the trunk. He felt a little bad for the crazy extra baggage fees Bro'd had to pay for his turntable, but like hell he was going to leave that shit back in Texas. How else was he supposed to make his mad tunage? He ran a hand over it for a moment before turning to his laptop bag, planning to look online at when move-in would start today. But to his surprise, he pulled out his iPhone, the one he'd assumed was in his pocket.

Glancing at it, he noticed there were eight unread messages, and one voicemail. Confused, he opened his inbox, eyes widening behind the shades at all of the texts from John.

EB: we just arrived in bellingham! gosh it is pretty.  
EB: hey dave i'm all moved in, my dad just left. thought i'd let you know.  
EB: well if you get here while i'm gone, i just went to look around campus. text when you get here.  
EB: guess what! i ran into jade! we're going to hang at her dorm. i'm a little worried though, shouldn't your plane have gotten in already?  
EB: dave is everything okay? you haven't answered any of my texts all day…  
EB: seriously why aren't you answering, i am getting really worried.

GG: hi dave! :) i was just wondering if everything is okay cuz john seems really worried! hehe he didnt say that of course but i can tell. you should text him back! <3

EB: damnit dave okay i am heading back from jade's. you better be there!

Hands quivering a little, Dave called his voicemail inbox and raised the phone to his ear.

_You have one unheard message. First unheard message: "D-Dave. Please call me back. I… I need you."_

His arms went numb and his face paled. "Shit," he murmured, slamming the trunk closed and running to the door at the bottom of the roundabout. It was locked. " _Fuck_." Dave turned to the car next to the door, and gestured at the woman sitting in the driver's seat. The passenger's side window rolled down and he walked towards the car.

"Hey is there any way you can let me into the building? I don't have my key yet but I really need to get in," he said hurriedly. She looked at him with concern.

"I don't have a key, but my daughter should be – oh, there she is now."

Dave turned and saw the woman's daughter leaving the building and quickly ran to the door before it could close, swerving around the girl as she walked out with her eyes glued to her phone. He didn't quite know where he was going, but he knew his room number, so he climbed the closest stairs he could find, which brought him to the main lounge. He jumped over the railing for the walkway and ran past the rows of mailboxes and front desk, taking the stairs three at a time.

In what was likely less than a minute, Dave stood panting lightly in front of their door, marked with nametags in the shape of gaming controllers by the resident advisor. _How fucking cute_ , he thought, trying the doorknob and finding it locked. _Of course._ He pounded on the door, not giving a single fuck that he was being so loud at six o'clock in the morning. After about another minute, he finally heard the lock on the other side of the door click, and the door opened slowly.

A non-speckled, fully clothed, messy-haired, bleary, baggy-eyed John peeked his head out, obviously still half asleep. "Wh-what…?" he yawned. He blinked a few times before his eyes could register, however blurry without his glasses, the blond hair, the shades, the red sleeves and record shirt. Suddenly John's eyes were wide, his entire body at alert. He looked up, blue eyes dark and watery. "D…Dave?"

They stared at each other for a few moments, until Dave whispered, voice catching ever so slightly, "Shit, Egbert."

Almost without thinking, John moved forward, carefully wrapping his arms around Dave's waist. Dave froze, thinking back to John's apparently honest claim that Dave should expect many hugs, and felt his heart swell as he returned the gesture.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, and that I never responded to any of your texts," he murmured into John's ear. "The plane ended up getting delayed for stupid reasons, and I thought I had my phone with me, but I guess it got stowed away with my laptop. I should have noticed, I'm so, so sorry." John didn't say anything, and suddenly Dave could feel him trembling a little. "Egbert, I… I just listened to your voicemail. Is everything okay?" At that, John's arms tightened significantly around Dave.

"I had a nightmare," he said quietly, voice muffled against Dave's neck. He nuzzled closer, and Dave couldn't ignore the way John's breaths puffed against his skin. "I-It was awful…"

"It's okay, bro, I'm here now." He fought with himself for a moment before deciding to place a gentle kiss on John's earlobe. "Is there anything I can do to make it better?"

"Go…back to sleep…" John mumbled, his exhaustion clearly starting to get the better of him.

"Okay. Get in bed, I'll just run and tell Bro what's happening." When he started to move away, John whimpered softly and tightened his grip.

"Please don't leave me," he whispered, and there was something so tragic in his tired voice, Dave knew it must have been one fucked up horrorterror. A feeling of protectiveness surged through him.

"I won't. I'm not gonna leave you." He slowly guided John back into the room, laying him down on the bed before, gulping in anticipation, he followed suit. John immediately reached for him, hands clutching his shirt and pulling himself closer, their foreheads gently touching, legs entangling. John sighed softly and appeared to drift off almost instantaneously. Ignoring the way his heart pounded against his ribcage, Dave carefully pulled his iPhone from his pocket and sent Bro a quick text.

TG: with john  
TG: lock the car before someone steals my shit

Finally, phone away, Dave rested a hand on John's hip and closed his eyes.

\--

Several hours later, when Dave felt himself becoming conscious, he opened his eyes and again felt his heart swell at the sight that met him; John, still sleeping, had his head tilted up and pressed closely to Dave's, his lips parted and puffing air past his big front teeth onto Dave's chin. Dave had to remind himself that this wasn't a dream.

"John," he said softly. Slowly, John's eyes fluttered open, confused for a few moments, until it dawned on him where he was, and who exactly was with him. A deep blush rose in his cheeks, and Dave smirked. He knew he'd been looking forward to seeing that.

"Oh," John said, and Dave could feel the shiver that ran through him.

"I didn't realize the nightmare repelling bed sharing gig would start so early on in our relationship, Egbert. Don't you think we're moving a little fast?" John gaped, his ears reddening. _Shit, he is fucking cute._

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't want to make you uncomfortable!" He sat up abruptly before Dave had the chance to hold him still, and gasped. Dave's eyes narrowed a little.

"What is it?"

"Your stuff…"

Confused, Dave disentangled his legs from John's and rolled over so that he was facing the rest of their room. To his surprise, all of his belongings were set up; red bedspread made (though it was messily done), MacBook and Nikon on his desk and his turntable next to it, a poster of the Midnight Crew and a lot of his photography taped to the wall. It looked like there was a smuppet with a note attached to it on his bed.

"Shit, he didn't actually leave one of those things with me, did he?" Dave groaned, sitting up and moving over to his bed to look at the note as John put on his glasses.

_Hey, Lil Bro. You and John seemed a little preoccupied so I took it upon myself to set up all of your shit so you wouldn't have to wake up. I'm probably on the plane back by now. Have fun in college. – Bro_

Much to his own horror, his cheeks turned pink with embarrassment. Bro had seem him and John together like that? He would probably never live it down…

"What does it say?" John asked. Dave crumpled the note in his hand and turned to face his friend, perfectly aware of the blush on his face. He might have had the decency to feel mortified if John wasn't looking at him with those wide eyes, hair sticking up every which way and plaid button-up slipping over one shoulder. _Jegus, Egbert…_

"Oh, just that Bro set up my shit and is headed back for Texas," he replied, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. John frowned and looked away.

"I'm sorry, Dave. I didn't think you wouldn't get to say goodbye to him…"

Dave watched him for a moment before moving closer, touching John's face softly. He looked up just in time for Dave to lean in, pressing his lips firmly against John's. Dave was suddenly thankful for the way his eyes were hidden behind his sunglasses, because he kept them open, watching as John closed his, color rising in his cheeks while he leaned into the kiss. Surely he'd never seen something so beautiful.

Several moments passed, and Dave was the one to pull away first, which he supposed was a good sign. John opened his eyes slowly, staring at Dave in surprise with lips parted. "Bro and I said goodbye to each other before we even left, so don't go all feeling guilty for nothing." He ruffled John's hair and gave him a half-smile. "Now come the fuck on, Egbert, did you really sleep in those clothes? Shit bro, at least _try_ to have some class."

Sensing John was feeling a little dazed, Dave decidedly turned around, heading towards John's closet to give him some space and find him a change. After a couple minutes of sifting through John's shirts (most of them t-shirts with lame video game references), Dave almost decided to just tell John he might as well give up trying to be cool, but John coughed before he could. It sounded embarrassed.

"Um… Dave…" Dave turned around to see John biting his lower lip, eyes averted. "That was… my first kiss."

The coolkid froze. That was John's first…? Well, Dave couldn't quite admit to being surprised—he obviously thought Egbert was the most adorable goddamn thing to walk the planet and didn't quite understand why _everyone_ wasn't trying to jump him all hours of the day, but… John had said back then that he couldn't connect to others, that after sburb he couldn't really fathom being with anyone. _Anyone but me._ A surge of pride rushed through Dave, and he dropped the shirt he was holding before walking back over to the bed and climbing halfway onto it, one knee balancing on the edge while his hands planted themselves firmly into the covers at either side of John, his face moving so closely to John's that he could feel his shallow breathing on his lips. He paused there for a moment, amazed that this was even happening, before leaning in again for a short kiss.

"And that was your second," he said, his voice low. Another kiss. "And that was your third." He pulled back and watched John's half-lidded expression closely. "Are we used to this yet?"

John blinked and looked into Dave's shades, his blush lingering. "I don't think I ever want to get used to feeling like this."


	2. Chapter 2

A month passed after Dave moved into their dorm, and John was happy to say that he was not yet used to _any_ of these feelings.

Every time Dave spoke, that adorable Texan twang tingeing each word, John felt giddy with attraction. When Dave asked him to plug in his keyboard and play for some new sick beats he was working on, John blushed and hurriedly obliged, honestly surprised Dave thought he was good enough. Every weeknight, after a long day of studying and classes, Dave pulled him away from his textbooks and over to the dining hall so that they could eat together, and John felt warm and loved. When, sitting on his bed and condescending to watch Con Air with him like he'd promised back then, and Dave's fingers deftly entwined with John's when John began to cry at the touching reunion scene, John almost couldn't help but cry a little harder knowing it was Dave's hand in his. When John fell asleep with textbooks spread out all over his bed at two in the morning, and he woke up to see them all cleaned up, and his glasses folded neatly on his desk, and a softly snoring Dave curled up against him under the covers, he had to remind himself to breathe.

Being with Dave – being Dave's boyfriend? John wasn't sure – was seriously the most amazing thing to ever happen to him. It was one thing to have realized while in sburb that Dave was probably the most important person in his life, or after they finally beat sburb to think of Dave whenever he felt sad, or lost, or lonely, and be comforted. It was another entirely to have Dave physically there, have a Dave that was so attuned to his moods and habits that he didn't even have to say anything for Dave to know he was scared; to have a Dave that held his hand and let him cling for no reason other than he wanted to be close to Dave. Sometimes John wondered hopelessly how Dave didn't get tired of him, how he put up with the constant hugs and (sometimes even public) displays of affection. John didn't really think he could help himself. But regardless, Dave would always just blush a little before taking his hand, or leaning over and pressing his lips against the soft spot behind his ear.

Despite how intimate their relationship was, and how happy it made him, John couldn't help but wonder why Dave still hadn't taken off his sunglasses. Dave had told him, back when he'd first confessed his feelings, that John was the sole owner of the irony bypass key, that John would probably break down his coolkid façade without even trying, and at the time John's heart had pounded so quickly at those words that he felt a little dizzy. And Dave had been honest, for sure; he often told him that even he would have difficulty making handholding and kissing and bed-sharing ironic, if he even wanted to in the first place. But something about the ever-present shades made John feel like Dave was still guarded, still had something about himself that he was not willing to share. John wanted to respect that, he really did. He just wished it didn't make him feel…

What _did_ it make him feel, exactly? He supposed it was something like inadequacy, like not being good enough. He knew he was stupid to feel that way, but he couldn't help it. Dave had full access to his eyes; whenever he wanted, Dave could just stare into them and see everything John felt like reading a book. John didn't have that luxury; with the shades there, it was always difficult to tell quite what Dave was thinking. Honestly, when John allowed himself to think about it, he felt like he was missing a big part of who Dave really was behind the façade.

\--

Sometimes when Dave woke up in the morning to the feeling of John's legs moving between his, or John's hands unconsciously rubbing circles on his back underneath his shirt, he had to force himself to calm down—usually by sneaking to the bathroom to take a long, cold shower.

Back in high school, when Dave was fully convinced that his love for John would forever go unrequited due to what he'd assumed was their tragic incompatibility, he had told himself that if he tried being with someone else, his feelings for John would eventually fade away. So saying, he hooked up with a few girls (only girls—he feared having sex with a boy would only encourage his subconscious to imagine John). Every time, he didn't particularly like it, but it never really disgusted him. It felt hollow, meaningless. And above all, it didn't make him stop loving John. If anything, he only felt ashamed of himself for thinking that fucking some unsuspecting, love-struck girls would ever, _ever_ make him fall out of love with John. He could almost figure that the emptiness of sex only reinforced the strength of the feelings he harbored for his best bro.

Naturally, as soon as John clued him in to the mutuality of his attraction, he made sure any delusional classmates understood that business hours were over, that this coolkid was taken and no number of swooning fans could change that. Jegus, he loved being taken. Actually physically being near John in itself was the fucking most amazing thing to ever happen all by itself, and then the fact that he was allowed to hold John's hand and be hugged by him and kiss him and sleep in the same bed made him wonder why he wasn't dying of an amazingness overdose by now.

Of course, as the (increasingly frequent) escapes to the shower might illustrate, being physically near John wasn't always easy. Dave wasn't kidding anyone; he'd spent practically all of his teenage years wanting to be _physical_ with John, if you would be so kind as to catch his drift. It was just his luck that he would fall hopelessly in love with the single most oblivious, sexually unaware boy on the planet (and probably others). But in spite of all that, Dave realized that until John was ready, sex held no precedence. John honestly represented everything that was bright and beautiful in the world. He smiled every morning, held his hand when Dave felt frustrated, gazed at him like there was no one in this universe or any other that he would rather be with, cooked for him when he was too busy with his studies to leave the dorm, cuddled with him every night, and miraculously enough managed to chase away all of the nightmares. Although Dave would give anything to make love to him, John deserved to be romanced, to go at exactly the pace with which he was comfortable. And for John, Dave would be willing to wait a lifetime.

\--

EB: well i’m just a little confused.   
TT: What is confusing you?   
EB: i guess, it’s just that we hold hands a lot   
EB: and he really likes to kiss me   
TT: This doesn’t sound like a problem, John.   
TT: Unless you simply are not enjoying it.   
TT: While I would find it hilarious that Dave is not cool enough to woo you, naturally I worry that he will attempt to take advantage of you.   
EB: rose, he isn’t that underhanded!   
EB: and i am definitely enjoying it.   
TT: My, my, John. Consider me shocked.   
EB: oh my gosh rose shut up.   
EB: we haven’t done anything inappropriate.   
TT: Is that so? How does he manage?   
EB: i don’t know, it’s never really been a problem.   
TT: Well, if you are enjoying the goings on between the two of you, what exactly do you find confusing?   
EB: i guess it’s just that… well, he tells me he loves me   
EB: but i’m not sure if what we’re doing is dating   
EB: like, he hasn’t specifically gone out and said “hey john will you be my boyfriend” or anything.   
TT: John, you know how I love to psychoanalyze the inner workings of Dave’s mind.   
EB: yeah, that’s why i was kind of hoping you’d be able to help me.   
TT: First of all, Dave has been in love with you since we were thirteen.   
EB: what? he has?   
TT: John, it was so obvious, I was honestly a tad disgusted with him for his transparency. To think he prides himself on his irony.   
TT: But in any case, the fact that you have recently reciprocated his feelings after so long of thinking you to be heterosexual is making him cautious.   
TT: It is one thing to kiss you, but what if, in trying to legitimize your relationship, he ends up frightening you? You did spend a lot of time affirming that you are not a homosexual for the majority of the friendship, after all.   
TT: Basically, he does not want to push you into anything that might make you uncomfortable.   
EB: wow   
EB: do you really think so?   
TT: If I know Dave at all, then I can almost assure this is his train of thought.   
EB: he is so stupid   
EB: of course he wouldn’t push me away   
TT: I take it you would prefer to become “official.”   
EB: i… well yeah i guess so.   
TT: Perhaps it would be wise to take it upon yourself to bring your (and his, for that matter) desires to fruition.   
EB: hm… maybe i will do that.   
EB: thanks rose, you are so helpful.   
TT: Anything for you, John.

\--

Dave was at his desk, headphones covering his ears, the music so loud that John could hear it from where he was lying in his bed. It looked like he was working on an essay for English 101, one hand in his hair, eyebrows furrowed and pen poised over the notebook paper. John didn't realize he had been staring at him for the past twenty minutes until he looked over.

"Sup?" he asked. John blushed and turned back to his French notecards.

"Nothing," he said dismissively. Dave didn't seem to think much of it, because John saw him in his peripheral vision turn back to his notebook.

So, he had to somehow convince Dave that he was totally comfortable being his boyfriend. He stared blankly at the word _se lever_ for another ten minutes, contemplating how in the world he was going to do this without feeling like he might die of embarrassment.

Without meaning to, his gaze again raised to Dave, lingering over the eyebrows that dipped behind his sunglasses in frustration, the light, almost unnoticeable sprinkling of freckles on his cheeks, the lips that were soft and slightly parted—

"Egbert." John blinked and realized that Dave was looking at him, headphones lowered to his neck. "Hey, not that I don't find your inconspicuous little stare-fest adorable or anything, but it isn't doing my concentration any good." John reddened considerably. "Heh." Dave laid his headphones down and moved slowly over to the bed, and John felt his heart hammering away in his chest as he came closer, hands on his thighs, lips gently touching. Dave smirked. "I didn't want to do that essay anyways."

John's eyebrows furrowed a little. Goddamnit, if he was going to do this, he was going to do it.

Swiftly, John grabbed the back of Dave's neck, pulling him more firmly against him, his tongue pushing past the lips that Dave had parted in surprise. The coolkid stilled, clearly not expecting something like this, but after several moments was more than happy to partake, hands sliding up thighs and tongue sliding expertly over John's. Many minutes of kissing and grabbing and moaning passed before John had to pull away, figuring if he went any longer without a proper breath he might pass out. He was admittedly a little pleased that Dave's breathing was also rather heavy.

"D – ave, I want – to go out."

"W – What? Like, to the – dining hall?"

John pressed his face into Dave's shoulder, the fingers that were clutching the record shirt tightening. "N-No. I want to go out on a date."

Dave visibly froze; not even his chest heaved for breath anymore. Something cold ran through John, and he pulled closer. What if Rose had been wrong? What if Dave didn't want to label their relationship? What if—

"Really?" the coolkid asked, his voice trembling and breathless. John sat up and looked at Dave, saw the creased eyebrows and mouth agape with incredulity, and suddenly felt like an idiot for doubting Rose's words. How could he ever forget what Dave himself had said to him?

_i dont want to be with anyone else either_

_not in this universe or any other_

"I'm tired of not knowing," John finally said, more steadily than he thought he'd be able to. "I want to be allowed to call you my boyfriend. I want to be _yours_." Dave's head dipped down, his shoulders tense as if he was bracing for something, and John touched him gingerly. "Dave…?"

He let out a breath that sounded suspiciously like a sob. "Of course I want to be your fucking boyfriend," he retorted, but the tremulousness of his tone took the edge away.

John took Dave's chin in his fingers and lifted his face so that they were level before hesitantly reaching for his sunglasses. Dave moved surprisingly slowly, hands covering the ones that grasped the frames and holding them there, preventing the shades from being removed. He leaned forward just as slowly, lips pressing lightly against John's as he whispered, "Not yet. I may have to do a fucking pirouette off the handle if I let anyone see how absolutely in tatters my coolkid façade is right now."

John smiled, and kissed him. "That's okay. I'll wait as long as it takes."

\--

Friday found John in the library, studying like his life depended on it for the insane biology midterm he had on Monday. For the record, Introduction to Biology is not nearly as cool as ectobiology. Nevertheless, John didn't feel terrible about his impending doom. At least he understood most of the concepts, unlike half of the worthless freshmen in his class. (Those were Dave's words, of course. John couldn't bring himself to say it himself.)

His PDA buzzed and he pulled it out of his pocket, grateful for a distraction.

TG: bro meet me by those weirdass stairs pronto

John gave his PDA a confused look.

EB: what, do you mean the stairs that lead to nowhere?   
TG: yeah whatever do you seriously think i even give any fucks at all about what theyre called   
EB: i’m studying for my midterm, dave.   
TG: its friday egbert   
TG: jegus you have got to be the derpiest nerd i have ever met in my entire life   
TG: also are you still wearing that ridiculously dorky sweater vest you had on earlier   
EB: no dave, your insults have wounded me so badly that i went home to cry over it and then change into something cooler.   
TG: ok good then ill see you here soon right   
EB: yeah i’ll be there in a couple minutes.   
EB: and sweater vests make me look handsome, alright?   
TG: yeah yeah i agree you look really hot in sweater vests   
TG: dont tell anyone i said that though

A rush of butterflies exploded in John's stomach, and he decided he'd rather hurry the hell over there and kiss the living daylight out of Dave than sit here wasting more time with another text.

When he arrived, he looked around, but didn't see Dave anywhere.

EB: well i'm here, where are you?

But before he could press send, he heard the eerily familiar notes of one of his favorite songs being played by a guitar somewhere nearby. He looked up, eyes wide, to see Dave walking up the other side of the sculpture, wearing a long-sleeved white dress shirt under a rather classy, grey button-up vest that went well with the light grey skinny jeans. There was an acoustic guitar strapped to him, right hand strumming as the left worked the neck.

"D-Dave, you can't be serious," John said, not even caring that he was grinning like an idiot. Dave ignored him and continued playing.

" _How do I get through one night without you_ ," he sang, and John thought he might die as Dave began walking down the stairs, staring straight at him. John couldn't find the strength to be surprised that Dave actually had an amazing voice. " _If I had to live without you, what kind of life would that be? Oh I, I need you in my arms, need you to hold. You're my world, my heart, my soul. If you ever leave, baby you would take away everything good in my life_."

A crowd was beginning to form around them, random passersby wondering what was going on or just wanting to watch the dope with tears in his eyes and a big grin on his face be serenaded by the attractive cool kid. John thought he could see Jade out of the corner of his eyes, hands covering her mouth and squealing with fangirlish glee. He tried to ignore her.

Which, actually, wasn't very hard as Dave reached the grass, standing right in front of John and watching him closely as he sang, " _And tell me now, how do I live without you? I want to know. How do I breathe without you if you ever go? How do I ever, ever survive? How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?_ " He strummed the final chord of the chorus and let the sound die away before pulling the strap around so the guitar was on his back and leaning forward, kissing John right there in front of everyone, which only seemed to elicit applause and a few catcalls from the onlookers.

When he pulled away, Dave said, "Now that I've pretty much serenaded the shit out of you, I was wondering if you'd like to go on a date with me tonight. Nothing special, just dinner and a movie. A _good_ movie, please."

"Con Air is the best movie," John quipped quietly before pulling Dave in for another kiss.

\--

They sat in a lively Thai restaurant, seated close together in a corner, talking over a small table lit with a candle.

"I didn't know you could play the guitar," John remarked. Dave smirked.

"Technically I can't, really." John gave him a questioning look. "Well, I may or may not have gotten Jade to teach me the basics, and possibly I have been spending practically every waking hour for the past week in her dorm practicing."

John felt his cheeks glow. "Dave… that's so sweet."

"What can I say? I am the master of romance, my brofriend. Not to mention I now have the power to play How Do I Live ironically whenever I want." John giggled as the waitress walked over with their orders, setting down a bowl of red curry in front of Dave and a plate of pad thai in front of John.

"Enjoy your meal," she said quietly, and John made sure to thank her before she left.

There were a few minutes of silence as they began eating, but Dave could tell John was distracted. He saw each little surreptitious glance John shot at him like it was child's play. Throwing discretion to the wind, Dave leaned over the table and kissed John softly for a moment before leaning back and stealing some of his fried rice.

"This is some good shit," he said with his mouth half-full. "It's a shame you aren't eating any of it." John colored and sighed in exasperation.

"Okay, I get it, I get it. I was just thinking about your sunglasses. Why do you never take them off?"

One corner of Dave's lips rose, a sort of half-smirk. "You got them for me and they make me think of you."

"Pfft, whatever Dave. Come on, what's the real reason? You wore those weirdly ironic anime shades all the time before I got you those."

Dave sighed. He supposed if it was John he didn't mind sharing, but looked at his curry from behind the shades as he spoke regardless.

"Alright, here's the deal. I have red eyes. It's weird, it's unnatural, I don't know why they are that way, but they are. I never thought much of it until I got into school, where kids started to make fun of me for it. In middle school assholes and douchebags made it a point to beat me up after school, and I was too ashamed to really talk to Bro about it. Of course Bro isn't an idiot, he figured it out easily. That's why he started training me so hard, so that I could fight back and not have to be scared of my classmates. Eventually we went to the school with some fake-ass doctor's note saying my eyes were overly sensitive or some shit and giving me permission to wear sunglasses at all times. I guess I just never really grew out of the habit."

Finally he looked up to see John frowning at him. "That's awful," he whispered. "I'm so sorry that you had to go through something like that."

Dave gave a small smile. "Hey, no need to apologize. I mean, you know what it's like. It's hard being a kid and growing up. It's hard and no one understands."

\--

It was late at night when they returned from a movie that had been a startlingly nice mixture of action and romance, and only the light from John's desk lamp fought the darkness as they lied in bed, kissing deeply, hands in hair or clutching shirts or unbuttoning vests. Dave moved to John's neck, kissing and biting softly and licking and sucking, and he couldn't think of any good reason as to why they didn't do this more often. He loved hearing all of John's little reactions, sighing, moaning, gasping, nails digging into Dave's back. He could barely register his own surprise when John rolled halfway on top of him, sitting up enough that Dave could no longer reach his neck, and stared down at him with an oddly serious expression.

He didn't have to say anything, and this time Dave didn't fight him as he reached for the sunglasses, pulling them gently away from his face. John's lips touched one eyelid, and then the other, and Dave finally opened his eyes and stared into John's, his first completely unobstructed view. But John didn't ogle, or gasp in surprise, or really react at all. He merely leaned down again and resumed kissing him. Dave didn't know what he had been expecting, but this hadn't been it. He supposed he didn't care, though, as long as it somehow made a difference to John.

No, perhaps something was different. There was a strange energy running through John, a paradoxical feeling of urgency in the way John kissed him, the way his hands found his, fingers entwining, while somehow he seemed so calm, so sure of himself. Dave found this new current enticing as it was confusing, and when John's knee pulled up between his legs, he didn't bother trying to hide the fact that he was aroused, and couldn't even feel disbelief when John pressed more firmly against him with a low moan, because nothing had ever felt more natural.

His name was sighed into his ear as John decreased the distance between them, their chests and hips pressed together, and Dave squeezed his hands when he felt that John was also aroused. Ever so slowly, John pushed against him, his breathing shallow, and Dave kissed his neck, his ear, tried to ignore the growing dizziness as John's grinding became steadier. It didn't take long for his own breath to begin to stagger, and John clearly didn't know what he was doing, was working off instinct alone, shit they still had all of their clothes on for christ's sake, but nothing had ever felt so intimate, so meaningful. Dave shut his eyes tightly. "J- _John_ ," he moaned, bucking back a little, just to feel John's gasp in his ear, followed by a needy whine.

"A-Again," he groaned, his driving movements insistent. "Please say it again—"

" _John_ ," Dave whimpered, more because of the way their hips fit together than because John had begged it of him, though the desperation in his tone was certainly no help. "Oh god, _John_ …"

With that, John arched, almost completely silent in his release but for the small, broken sound that cracked from his throat. Usually Dave could have gone on for a much longer period of time, but the sight of John, spent by his doing, was enough to send him over the edge, and he shuddered his moan against John's neck.

Several minutes of catching breath and controlling heartbeats passed, and when John finally lifted himself enough to look Dave in the eyes, Dave was about ready to die of happiness. That is, until John opened his mouth to gently say, "Dave, I love you."

Dave reached up and kissed him. There really was no one else he could imagine holding this way, and he felt it so strongly that tears came to his eyes. His façade, his irony, humanity, trollmanity; he could forget about all of it as long as he still had John Egbert to hold onto. And Dave Strider knew that he would never let go.


End file.
